


Weather Patterns

by Sara_Ellison



Category: Thor (Movies)
Genre: Awkwardness, Breakfast, F/M, Hammerplay, Thunderstorms
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-07
Updated: 2014-05-07
Packaged: 2018-01-23 22:33:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 703
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1581797
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sara_Ellison/pseuds/Sara_Ellison
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Thor accidentally makes storms when he's excited, I guess.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Weather Patterns

**Author's Note:**

> Just a silly drabble, because I woke up to a thunderstorm this morning. In case you didn't stay through the end of the credits of The Dark World, Thor came back to Earth to stay with Jane.

Ian is scared of thunderstorms. Darcy laughs at him at first, teasing him, calling him a puppy and offering him treats. He hides under the covers while the thunder crashes around him, and she pets him and quickly discovers that this is an effective distraction to keep him from being too scared. He's already down there, may as well make himself useful. Given the frequency of the storms, she's getting laid a _lot_ , and she stops caring that the weather patterns are weird pretty quick.

Jane is a pretty good roommate. When she's not super excited about the sciencey stuff, she's quiet—doesn't play music loud enough for Darcy to hear, so it doesn't clash with Darcy's own jams, doesn't leave a mess in the bathroom, doesn't make awkwardly loud sex noises in the middle of the night. Darcy knows she's guilty of that last one, but given that she usually has sex during thunder storms, she doesn't think anyone else in the flat can hear her anyway. The storms start slow, just a few quiet rolls of thunder, before building gradually to an eventual deafening crescendo. Kinda like sex. Darcy's pretty sure no one could hear her no matter how loud she screams, not when the storm's in full swing like that.

All things considered, it takes her an embarrassingly long time to put two and two together. It's not until she mentions the weather to someone who lives across town and gets "What storm?" in response that she realizes it's a very localized effect. And there might be a reason why she can't hear Jane and Thor making sex noises either.

She had kinda been thinking it had something to do with the whole god/mortal thing, the fact that Thor was like five thousand bajillion pounds of solid muscle, and Jane was kinda willowy and slender and could probably be broken in half by one of Thor's hands if he wasn't careful, and maybe Darcy herself wouldn't mind that but maybe Jane and Thor were abstaining for safety's sake. But it turned out that apparently that wasn't an issue, and they were both just really quiet in bed.

Except for the whole thunderstorm thing. Darcy guesses that's pretty extreme, as sex noises go. "So is it like an accidental side-effect, or are you doing it on purpose?" she asks the next morning at breakfast, and the looks on Jane's and Thor's faces are perfectly priceless as they realize what she's talking about. Ian just looks confused, and Selvig keeps his face neutral like he doesn't know or care what she means but she's pretty sure he does know.

Thor clears his throat. "An accident," he says. "I apologize if I've disturbed your sleep."

"Oh, no, no disturbance at all! You just keep right on thundering, big boy. I don't mind storms." She gives him a playfully affectionate punch on the arm which she's pretty sure he doesn't even feel at all.

"He is a thunder god, it's kind of what he does," Jane mutters, redfaced. She's scraping at her toast with a knife, apparently not noticing she's spread the butter too thin and is effectively just unbuttering it again.

"I wonder what the meteorologists think," Darcy says. "Do you think they've noticed that it pretty much always happens in the same place?"

"I hope meteorologists have better things to do than study a highly localized and low-impact weather pattern!" Jane says, a little huffy.

"I don't like storms," Ian puts in, quietly.

"Yes you do, shut up," Darcy tells him, and he obediently does so. He's such a good boy, that intern. "Anyway, I guess there are a lot worse things you could be doing. Like hammerplay. Is that a thing? I bet that's totally a thing back on Asgard, isn't it? You ever get freaky with Mewmew?" She still can't pronounce Mjolnir right and doesn't really care.

"Darcy!" Jane protests, scandalized, and by the look on her face, yeah, hammerplay is totally a thing. "Can we change the subject? Please?"

No one can seem to think of another subject to change it to, and they sit in awkward silence. Darcy grins and takes another bite of her eggs. Delicious.

**Author's Note:**

> Who knows where Thor's been during all the HYDRA shit? I sure don't.


End file.
